Friday, July 22, 2016


It has been four years...

Four years since my Matt and I covenanted with one another and became husband and wife. Four years filled with smiles, adventures, laughs, tears, two beautiful baby girls, four moves, many seminary classes, one graduation, and countless other memories.

This anniversary, for two weeks before and one week after, Matt and I have been apart as he has been studying in a Hebrew immersion program. We have spent time apart before, but this particular time has made me more aware of how much of "one flesh" we really have become since that sunny July day four summers ago. Whenever we are apart, it feels like part of me is missing, and when we are together, we complement one another so well it feels like God designed us specifically for one another. I am blessed beyond words to have been given a husband like Matt.

I was reflecting on our marriage as I was writing Matt a letter for our anniversary, and I was struck how being his wife has given me so many glimpses of my relationship with Christ, my heavenly Groom.

1. Safe. Matt stands over a foot and a half taller than me and is almost twice my size in weight. One of our friends in college told us we have a "very diverse height ratio." I just like to call him my tall, dark, and handsome :) He is so much stronger than me, and he could easily overpower me. Yet, the place I feel the most safe in this world is in his arms. Matt would never hurt me- he has never once even raised his voice to me. I know I can trust him with my whole heart. He is strong, yet gentle and kind- with me and with our sweet little girls. And I know these attributes in Matt are because of Jesus' work in his heart- and because of this, they give me glimpses of God- the Creator of the universe, Who commands the lightning and stirs the seas, Whose very words could turn us to dust, and Whose wrath is fierce over sin. Yet, because of Jesus, our omnipotent God chose to set His love on us! He leads us tenderly, and we are safe in His everlasting arms. What a comforting truth to think on.

2. Desired.  Matt and I have always loved spending time together. When we were separated during our engagement- while he was at seminary and I was student teaching, we would have what we called Skype "study dates"- in which we basically sat in silence and studied, looking up every so often to smile at each other or share something we were reading. It was nice to just be "together" however we could, even if we had to spend most of that time studying. And now, even after four years of marriage and two kids, we still love to spend time together- though now that time is often spent listening to Barney in the background, jingling a colorful baby toy in front of the baby, with a  few interruptions for diaper changes or potty breaks. But this is the season of life we are in now, and "doing life" with Matt has made the days a joy and not a drudgery. And even when I'm still in pjs at the end of the day, and feel like I haven't slept in days, and am on the verge of tears, Matt desires to spend time with me, and he takes the time to hold me and listen to me. What a picture to me this is of Christ's love to me! I am so sinful and have nothing God should desire in me- in fact, I deserve His wrath. Yet, because of Jesus, He sees in me nothing but Christ's beauty and righteousness and He is preparing a place for me to spend all of eternity with Him! This is completely breathtaking  to me!

3. Pursued. The world portrays marriage as dull and lifeless. You fall in love, then fall out of love, following your heart wherever it may take you. Yet, God says marriage is a picture of His love for His people. It is a sacred covenant, not to be taken lightly, and it is a gift. The world says "romance" fades after the "honeymoon phase," and it almost expects husbands and wives to fade from loving one another to merely tolerating one another. This makes me so sad. Yes, I believe there are seasons to marriage- being newly-married, welcoming children into the world, raising children, raising teens, taking care of elderly parents, enjoying grandchildren, and whatever else life may bring. Matt and I have only been through a few of these seasons so far- we have special memories of our first years of marriage, of learning to live with one another, and being able to spend countless hours together. And now we are in a season with littles- a season which brings tiredness and a season in which time together is scarce yet, when we are together, all we want to do is take a nap! Yet, Matt has shown Jesus to me by loving me through both the days filled with laughter and the days filled with tears and many opportunities for sanctification! He takes the time to ask me, "How is your heart today, my Ka?" And to write me letters because he knows they are my favorite, and to cook me eggs for my birthday and for Mother's Day and after church while I put the girls down for naps (I should probably teach him how to cook something else soon :) After four years together, he is still choosing to love me and to serve me. And he does this as a sinner- his love is still imperfect. How much more is Christ's love and pursuit of us! He set His love on us before time began, and He will love us not only today and tomorrow and ten years from now but into all of eternity!

Thank you, My Matt, for seeking to love me like Christ loves His Bride, the church.
I pray that God keeps growing us and using our marriage to show the world glimpses of the Gospel.
Happy 4th Anniversary!  

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